Depressing news for me and always me. I am a seriously cursed person. Why I sound so sad is because I just found out my first quarter college grades last night. I couldn't even sleep that night. It leads me to wonder why do I have to be asian? Why do I have parents who think that the only way to survive in the world is to get straight A's in college? If you get anything lower, you'll become a scumbag. Then it lead me to think Why didn't I work harder, study harder? Why did I have to take advantage of the freedom I got. I ask these questions yet I already know the answers. I'm Asian because God made me. I have these kind of parents because God made it that way and seriously, they just want me to have a good life, thus the strictness. And lastly, I seriously take too much advantage of the free time I had at Irvine. But I'm going to change that. Not the former two, but the latter. This upcoming quarter, I'm going to study hard. I'm not going to waste my time. I'm going to use my time wisely and stop meddling with unimportant stuff. The grades that I got this quarter is just a small step. Yes, this small step is a great impact towards my life but I'm the one who can make that negative step into a correct one. Whatever. I'm still in distress. This 2.8 gpa will not look great, so I'm going to have to work hard to redeem my GPA.
Now, I can't do anything about it though. Still sad thus the reason I'm drowning my sorrows in some good Korean dramas. Oh dear, what am I going to tell my parents? That's a question that I can't answer... yet.
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